I never got to know Anita in high school. We moved in different crowds. Our path may have crossed in some extra-curricular activities we joined but not enough to want to keep each other company or want to be invited in the group that each other belonged. Our closeness was the result of a planned re-union forty-five years after. Anita became the spark-plugged that got our group together through the internet. Everyone agreed because of Anita's persistence the re-union was properly coordinated and classmates coming from all over the world knew exactly what to expect. The network that she built had become the communication infrastructure that we are using now in preparation for our coming golden re-union. Through Anita's website my second book Bayanihan: The Many Great Lessons of United Laboratories, Inc received good publicity and orders were shipped to Anita for distribution among our classmates in the states.
I did not expect the almost Cinderella-like story of Anita seeing how her present life typifies a woman of the world. Enjoying all the comforts of life, able to travel anywhere at a moment's notice, visits to the theater on a regular basis, and occasionally splurges in the casino.
Her school life was a struggle. She thought college was a word reserved only for those who had money to spare. His father who was the neighborhood's tailor, much like Teyve's son-in-law in Fiddler On the Roof, was hardly able to make both ends meet and Anita's presence was needed to help complete some orders. A degree in college was out of the question. Yet, Anita has this character flaw; a dogged determination to see herself clothe in a learner's toga and carve a better life out of the hopeless condition she was in. To Anita social life in high school was non-existent. Her meager income helping in the tailor shop was reserved for the more important things she needed. School excursions or junior and senior prom were words strange to her. "What's that?" She would ask her friends.
She worked during daytime and read through the night to finish her studies. There were days when finals was an ordeal not because she was not prepared to hurdle the tough questions, but more a test permit was required before taking them. Her classmates who were mostly professional students sometimes would pitch in to raise the money she needed to pay the balance of her tuition fee. No, Anita never lived on handouts. She kept record of every centavo a friend gave and made sure each one got back their investment on her. Even if none of them expected to be paid. It was their gift to her.
Knowing how well she could focus on her priorities I couldn't believe that at an early age Anita would have a failed marriage. Much like Cinderella her luck changed when accepted to work at a US military installation. One of Uncle Sam's seamen fell in love with her south-sea like beauty and caused her to embrace the happy ending of Cinderella's story.
Ed was a loving husband and spoiled Anita. He treated Anita's two children from her early marriage much like the children of their own love. "They are my children too," he would tell Anita. "And I love all those that you love."
For the first time she knew how it is to be loved. Together they recognized that relationships are more important than achievements and that people are more important than things. These values made Anita and Ed want to connect with people. It's no wonder she would at times quit her computer at wee hours of the morning making sure that all the messages waiting are answered before she calls it a day.
Every time I open my email I see this many names affected by her love. Everyone wants to share even just a few minutes of her time. Her network has become the neighborhood sari-sari store which also is the "tsimis" center and I meant that in the nicest way.
More and more people even outside our class are getting connected because of her net. Seeing her dedication to keep communication going I cannot help but re-live efforts of the riders of the "Pony Express" who braved all dangers to bring news to the American West. As these riders were recognized as heroes of the past, in my book she is the modern heroine blazing the trail for the rest of us graduates of "Class '55".
This love she possesses has grown to everything that she's touched; she has created closeness in our separateness. She has linked us in the net and in doing so erased time and space. She has so much enthusiasm anyone would be proud to be in her circle of friends.
And yet we must accept that this kind of love can create a painful loneliness for those whose pride overcomes them. People want to be first in everything. Envy can destroy friendships. People instead of taking things in a stride would rather destroy beautiful creations because they want to be the first.
We must take things as they come. One day our friends who are experiencing a temporary collapse of ego will find their way back to the atmosphere of love Anita is creating on the net. The value of friendship we imbibed in high school, our "green and white" will carry us through.
In time we will see only the best in each other. Cervantes, a famous philosopher once said, "The journey is better than the inn." The focus in life should be the journey -- the travels we make in life day after day, week after week, month after month, and year after year, all these should have only one goal. More than physical evolution we must aspire for spiritual growth. It is in this plane where true friendship lies. Friendship can be vicious at times and would not hesitate to teach you the meaning of humility. To keep friendship at its true form we must spend time watering it with nuggets of wisdom. And if you're one of those who value true friendship then you will do no less.
At the end of the day our search for meaning must have only one result, a gracious and joyful meeting with the Lord.
And I find my interaction with my friend Anita, on the net, enjoyable.
